Todo se hace en silencio. Como
se hace la luz dentro del ojo.

-- Jaime Sabinas

the night falls over oaxaca very slowly. for hours the houses and the trees have been shining with a very sharp light, it has been for hours the light of the end of the day, I don't know how it is possible, probably the help of the old consumed stones of the colonial houses-- a light honest and direct like the appearance of the people walking about in the streets, families, kids, old folks, students, politicians, activists, mariachi bands, nuns and clowns; the mexican flags, big and familiar, have been waving against the blue sky with perfection above the relevant buildings; and the vendors, tireless, have been offering, the musicians have been playing instruments. I have been eating another quesadilla sitting at the comedor inside the market, bored to death by the corny mexican music, admiring the ceaseless animation, and the way the light, hazed by the releases of the kitchens working all around in the market house, entered from the above.
Now I sit in front of the monastery of santo domingo, there's still another guy playing, a bagpipe this time, high and trembling like a bird, and a dog looming down from a flat roof above a bar. There's only one thing I am able to think about now, only one person, two persons; but the eyes, in the silence of the visions, do all the dances. I just stay and observe. With a side of my mind, I repeat some spanish conjugation-- I regret the lack of irony and, the weakness. Then it's night time. Of everything else I am obviously unsure.

I wake up before 7 A.M. because of the party of young dutch students that took over the hostel yesterday. Overgrown by cattle hormones, absurdly tall and loud even when they barely move around on the old wooden floor, dutch guys and girls seem to be in every room of the hostel and in every bathroom and under every shower and into every room at this floor and at every floor of this part of the hostel. The hostel extends itself over several street numbers so I don't know if they took over there too. Anyway the turn-over for the bathrooms and showers has started slowly, and noisily, and as I lay in bed in my room I try to identify the moment when the bathroom on my floor will finally be accessible. I curse the dutch people of the world and try to sleep or at least masturbate but without success, 'cause they have now decided to hang just outside my door waiting for their turn, horsing around, calling down from the top of the stairwell, talking and laughing.

It's not before 9 that I can eventually use the bathroom and take a shower. By then the dutch world is gathering its people across the street, and is being noisy down there in the sun. From the window of my room they now look less noisy and less tall and are instead quite good looking, with their blond and red heads glowing under the bright sun light scouring 20th street out of the frozen snow.

I love this Hostel. I have my own double bed room, all run-down and sloppy, luckily no television. There are common bathrooms all right, but it's not a problem for me. Well, as long as the dutch leave something for me.
There is no curfew, it is all very clean, and it's in Chelsea, Manhattan. It is ridiculously pricey, but only compared to similar places outside New York or in Europe. It is actually cheap for the standards here.

From the Hostel I walk down towards the village, have breakfast somewhere (I wish there were alternatives to the fucking starbucks of my boots) and then I probably head towards a cyber cafe' in Bleecker street that seem to be run by a very nice middle-aged chinese lady who doesn't speak english except for two essential words, and who sweeps and mops the floor under your feet while you're there writing.

Afterwards it's the city, it's my being useless into its belly, it's bars I never dared to enter (thanks, Dita) and my feelings come and go, and at moments all the beauty of it, all its lively magic, all the moving accumulation of sorrows in the shaded maze of the subways hits me with a smell and a push, like the banal solitudes, the young couples kissing on the trains at night, the displays of fish and algae in Chinatown, the fabric stores I enter imagining what Libi would think or say of the colors and the materials, where the old jewish store manager tells me, "if you think you can pick the fabrics for your friend you must think you're very good."
And he's right, I mean. I could never pick the right fabrics.

in picture, above: you know what. It has nothing to do with the hostel though.

Saturday I was at home, sleeping. I slept all morning through part the afternoon. I tried to make it as peacefully as I could.
Just as I was working on it, dreaming I guess, grinding my teeth probably as I often do, on the other side of the city, near where I lived with Leni few years ago, actions of guerrilla were going on.
Remarkably for me, It's not the first time I am sleeping while somewhere outside in the city a battle goes on. I might say it happens every time: Me snoring, them fighting. Maybe I dream those battles, who knows.

When finally I woke up, I learned the news, thought of my brother. This also always happens when there's a battle. Because he would have been out there battling, wearing an helmet and throwing stones and looking for fascists or policemen to beat, it's impossible for me not to picture him, earning his grades this way. He would have been there, but he doesn't live in Italy anymore, which is better for me so that my thoughts toward this kind of fighting in the streets can be more detached. Otherwise there would be sheer intolerance without any further rational thought. I don't get along with my brother very much.

What happened is that there was an electoral masquerade going on, the neo-fascist nearly-governative party "Fiamma tricolore" (Three-colored flame) marching the streets with the usual show of celtic crosses, roman salutes, skinheads, moronic chants.
Not having better things to do, organizations of the extreme left, social centers, neo-communists and anarchists organized a march against them. (In the pictures below, from Repubblica.it and corriere.it: the mentioned fascists, with hair uncertainties and roman salutes, all coming from families of immigrants or half-immigrants, marching behind a banner saying: "no more immigrants")

Not with the same intensity (everything is less intense in Milan), things went as in Genova during the G8 few years ago. Groups of demonstrators from the left-wing march, forced by the police to continuous stops, started their acts of "political" vandalism.
At the end of the morning (me always sleeping), Corriere.it recounted: Four car burned down, more damaged, a local shop used for electoral propaganda by AN (right-wing government party originated by the same party as "Three-colored Flame") burned down, a paper-bomb detonated near a Mac Do already rampaged by some of the protesters, scaring away customers with kids and all, a motorbike, garbage cans, a news stand, all burned down, windows and flower pots destroyed in the numbers, etc. (In the following pictures, from Corriere.it and Repubblica.it, scenes from the battle)

You must understand that, although not clearly visible by this selection of pictures, the battle went on between some groups of demonstrators and the police. Fascist marchers and communist marchers never actually met.
Too bad. Maybe that way we would have gotten rid of both, once and for all. Eliminating each other.

Instead, every now and then we are forced to watch this shameful idiocy going on. On one side, unharmed fascists with their roman salutes and racist chants going around the streets like it is a normal day; on the other, the childish nonsensical vandalism of this so-called rebels who give their best hand to right-wing governments, proving once again that the alternative to the moderate right-wing non-idea is disorder, anarchy, and disrespect of the peaceful indifference of middle-class lifestyle.
Well, the middle-class is the third character in this story not coming out very well. According to many news sources, the police had to save some of the protesters from the hands of passersby who wanted to lynch them. Or, more cowardly, who wanted the police to lynch them before their eyes. "Destroy them!" the enraged mob of peaceful citizens allegedly screamed. Of course only when the battle was finished.
The peaceful middle-class fathers wanting to lynch their sons, both parts high on confusion and hatred and boredom, and ignorance. What a nice, beautiful picture. Who wanted to take it, just a month before the elections, I wonder.

There's the stupid Book Fair this morning, and I have to be loading boxes at seven thirty. But I'd so get back to sleep just to give this dream another plot, if possible.